Gently falling snow outside my office window is masking the internal stress of a busy day, made harder by continued school bus and schedule disruptions with the Snowmageddon storm of four days ago.
There’s a saying in twelve step groups that everyone needs to spend 20 minutes a day in prayer and meditation, except for when you’re busy – in which case you double it.
So while my hair’s on fire with work deliverables and attendant stress from a tough situation I’m handling professionally, it’s a worthy time to pause, and do my version of the above. It’s called Five Deep Breaths.
When the kids spill the milk, when the administrators say something inane, when the spouse forgets something I told him 3 times, when the clients say some balderdash ridiculousness and I have to reply tactfully – I take a breath.
When W. disrobes on the babysitter then proudly shakes her hand goodbye, as he did yesterday – as if we all shake hands buck naked – I laugh, and take a breath.
When J. spends more time with his hands on his pants than on his tasks, to the point it’s publicly evident shall we say – I may wince, but I take a breath.
When the health insurance rejects yet another claim and further delays its already long payment, adding one more item to the growing “when I get 15 minutes” to-do pile – I fume, butI take a breath.
When I sigh remembering the person of my past, the one 10-lbs lighter and with a few less facial lines and sags, yet the one who still fits into a killer dress from time to time and has such richness and joy to relate to others, and hopefully bring to them too – I take a breath.
Namaste, dear readers. The journey of the special needs parent requires lots of taking breaths, and as I take mine, I feel yours.